i. riding the storm
It's been a while - but not everyone knows exactly how I spent my summer, so I wrote it down, read away - if you don't I'll never know.
I guess this might be entry one in a series, who knows?
Ever fallen over? We all do, gotta get up, dust yourself off and plug away. You can't eat gravel forever.
I fell, it was really bad. I woke up and a few hours were missing, no blood. But I was in hospital, I wanted out so I gave my ma a call. Doctors don't let you walk out if you can't really walk and were found in an alley unconscious. My ma came round to see what was up - the doctor wanted to do a CT scan, I couldn't hear in my left ear and that was my main sticking point. I can't be deaf in one ear - they don't make eyepatches for ears, so you don't even look cool, I'd go blind in one eye before - already sort of am and I don't wear my glasses. There aren't many things worth reading. Not even this.
I got the scan and sat about. It felt like ages because it was, typically a normal brain scan is fairly easy to read because there's no need for interpretation, this wasn't a normal brain by any estimation. It was bad, worse than usual.
Brain injuries aren't about the first whack, that's the best part really, it's all about the shape of the skull. The skull is like a little cave - stalagmites, stalactites and all. That initial whack is called a coup injury, it's nout, just an inconvenience but that sends the brain bouncing about - the contrecoup.
My brain was fucked.
Swelling, bruising, scarring.
The middle of your brain is supposed to stay put - mine didn't. I'm not sure that necessarily does anything, but it typically means trouble.
I'm taken up to a ward - I'd call it home for the next two weeks.
The day went on much as any other first day somewhere does - the bizarre shake up of routine, boredom, adjustment. I was finally right when I felt like I was being watched. I felt like I shouldn't be there - I didn't belong there, I was still me - that had to be enough. They wouldn't take my word for it.
I slept, sleeping in hospital is peculiar. The beds never feel right - "making you comfortable" isn't a thing you wanna hear though. There's always noise. Ticks. Beeps. Coughs. I was surrounded by other people with similar injuries but they were far worse off it seemed. The beeps were disconcerting, I don't know if they're supposed to be regular intervals or not - no beeps is the ideal number of beeps.
I didn't have any beeping machines - that was a positive.
That's what I got for now - hope you like!